Animated Character Database
Advertisement

(0:04) Memphis Stormfront in the Channel 3 Newscopter (0:06) with something still exclusive to live TV, (0:09) a police chase! (0:11) And if you're watching this on YouTube years later, (0:13) smash that like button, brah! (0:16) Dad, that looks like your SUV. (0:18) It can't be. Mine's in the shop.

(0:19) It's making a weird sound, kind of like... (0:23) Pow! (0:24) A lot of smoke, and that... (0:26) Pow! (0:27) Can't be good. (0:28) Oh, he's getting out. (0:29) He's making a run for it! (0:31) That's Wendell, my mechanic.(0:33) The police are closing in. (0:35) Wait, he's carjacking that Bugatti! (0:38) He is gone, gone, gone! (0:41) Two things. (0:41) We might need to look for a new mechanic, (0:43) and I definitely need to get a Bugatti.(0:45) But, honey, you love your SUV. (0:48) Well, everyone's getting Bugattis. (0:50) Even my friend Wendell has one.(0:51) A sports car. (0:53) Wow. (0:53) What would the kids at school say if we had a Bugatti? (1:01) Hey, ladies.Need a ride? (1:04) There's room on my mom's lap. (1:10) Hell yeah. (1:17) Hey, boys.Need a ride? (1:23) Hell yeah! (1:29) Hell yeah. (1:30) Hell yeah. (1:33) That settles it.(1:35) The Smiths are getting a Bugatti. (1:37) Francine, Hayley, we're running behind, (1:39) so hurry up and get your fantasies in before the... (1:43) Good morning, USA (1:46) I got a feeling that it's gonna be a wonderful day (1:50) The sun in the sky has a smile on his face (1:53) And he's shining a salute to the American race (1:59) Oh, boy, it's swell to say (2:03) Good morning, USA (2:13) I've been kicked out of car dealerships before, (2:15) but never for financial reasons. (2:17) Bugattis are like a million dollars.(2:19) We're fine with the SUV. (2:21) We can barely even afford to fix that. (2:23) Where is all our money going these days? (2:25) Okay, I was gonna be Baby Plumber Jr. today, (2:28) but after hearing your money woes, (2:30) I think it's a day for... (2:33) Susie Orrwoman, Financial Advisoress.(2:36) Wanna know why you can't afford that Bugatti? (2:38) You're not making your assets work for you. (2:40) Intriguing. Go on, Mrs. Orrwoman.(2:42) That's Miss Orrwoman. (2:43) Still haven't found the right lady (2:45) to make an honest woman out of me. (2:46) I'm a lesbian, so stop flirting with me.(2:49) Okay, let's take inventory of your assets. (2:51) Well, I've got this fridge and the garage fridge. (2:54) No, no, no, not material stuff.(2:56) I'm talking these assets. (2:58) What are these little flesh-and-bone piggy banks (3:00) doing for you? (3:01) Steve, contributions. Go! (3:03) Easy.You know those couple hundred sketches (3:05) of Toshi I did last summer? (3:07) Yes? (3:08) Well, they're on sale on my Etsy page, (3:11) and let's just say there's a lot of buzz. (3:14) Speaking of buzzed, Hayley? (3:16) I keep our food budget down with restaurant leftovers. (3:18) Like the Hub's all-you-can-eat-but-you-should-have-eaten-it-yesterday (3:21) tuna salad.(3:22) If we're talking budgets, that's my department. (3:24) I keep our books like I keep my man. (3:27) Sexually satisfied.(3:29) Okay, okay, assets looking good so far. (3:33) But what about flesh beard? (3:36) Me? (3:37) Mooch alert! (3:37) Jeff is not a mooch. (3:39) Well, he doesn't bring anything in.(3:41) And he takes a lot out. (3:43) Hey, that's right. (3:44) He even mooched off my Bugatti fantasy.(3:46) Lay off! (3:47) What Jeff lacks in income, he makes up for in heart. (3:50) Please, financially, there's no monetary value to heart. (3:53) Hit it, Klaus.(3:58) Let me tell you about Jeffrey the Moocher. (4:03) He's a-grabbin' and takin' (4:04) There's no money makin' low-down coochie-coocher. (4:09) Ha-ha-ha! (4:14) He'll borrow your car, bro, and bring it back with a dance.(4:19) He'll have a bunch of your cats and crunch, (4:21) and never offer you a cent. (4:24) Ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho! (4:27) This trombone tastes like shit. (4:36) Ah, this is the heavily used plunger from my plumber costume.(4:40) Face it, Smiths, when it comes to your finances, Jeff's worthless. (4:44) Jeff, why are you dancing around to a song about you being a mooch? (4:48) That song was about me? (4:55) Babe, you ever get the feeling the family thinks I'm a mooch? (5:00) Well, yeah, Klaus sang a whole song. (5:01) Never mind, don't listen to them.(5:03) Yoink! (5:04) Your nightlight is costing us ten cents a month. (5:07) Ten cents I'll never see again, thanks to you, Jeff. (5:10) But I'm scared of the boogeyman.(5:12) Here, there's one starter bullet in there. (5:14) You can earn the rest by really making that one count. (5:19) I think I need to get a job.(5:21) Well, whatever it is, just don't go overboard with it. (5:25) Start with something simple. (5:27) Okay, big ball on a chain.(5:31) Nothing simpler than that. (5:38) Aw, shoot, I missed. (5:40) Well, at least no one got hurt.(5:45) A construction accident? (5:47) He doesn't have health insurance yet. (5:49) Here, doc, take my wallet to the ER. (5:51) It's hemorrhaging.(5:54) Thanks, but seriously, how much was his ambulance ride? (5:56) You don't have to worry about that. (5:58) He came by wrecking ball. (6:01) This isn't funny, he's my husband.(6:04) Sorry, I think that pipe is laughing gas. (6:06) So that's going to make the bad news I have very awkward. (6:11) Jeff's brain dead.(6:13) Brain dead? (6:14) And on life support. (6:17) Life support? (6:20) I have to see him one last time. (6:29) Hey, babe.(6:30) Oh, my God, Jeff. (6:32) We can't afford this room. (6:33) Look at that, the meter is already running.(6:35) That's a heart monitor. (6:36) Turn it off. (6:37) Almost no brain activity, yet he's still functional.(6:40) Oh, this is totally normal for him. (6:43) Did someone say, I promise not to sue? (6:46) Who are you? (6:47) I'm a settlement lawyer on behalf of Termite Demolitions. (6:50) Are you the victim? (6:51) No, I'm the Jeff.(6:52) Whoa, clearly some major brain damage here. (6:57) That's going to take some extra zeros. (6:59) Let's call this a healthy shut the hell up settlement.(7:03) Keep Termite's name out of your mouth. (7:07) Holy, hey, you're rich. (7:10) Nope, still Jeff.(7:18) Jeffy boy. (7:19) Boogeyman. (7:20) Nope, just Boogey Stan.(7:21) And don't you worry about your nightlight. (7:23) I'll get that for you. (7:24) It just needs to be unsmashed with my unhammer.(7:27) Anything else you need? (7:28) More pillows? (7:29) We want our El Jefe nice and comfy. (7:32) We've been calling you El Jefe. (7:34) I picked you up a box of condoms, El Jefe, just in case.(7:38) I poked holes in all of them. (7:39) The next step is to get him to impregnate one of us. (7:41) Then we've got him locked down.(7:43) I'm not picky about who. (7:45) Let me rap at you, El Jefe. (7:46) Now that you're a millionaire many, many, many times over, (7:50) we thought you could help us get some important things we need, (7:53) like a Bugatti.(7:53) Yes, Jeff. (7:55) Stan's car is still in the shop, so I'm going to need one too. (7:58) And as you know, Toshi and I have been working on our (8:01) Siegfried and Roy tribute show.(8:03) I feel a white tiger is a necessary next step. (8:06) Get out of here, you vultures. (8:08) It's Hayley.(8:08) Split. (8:11) Jeff, do not start buying them stuff. (8:13) They're trying to mooch off you now.(8:15) Look, we need to make smart investments with this money (8:18) and plan for our future. (8:20) What are you saying? (8:21) That we can get away from all this. (8:23) The vultures, my childhood bedroom.(8:26) The Boogeyman? (8:27) Yes, you get it. (8:29) And we'll get our own place. (8:30) Wow.(8:31) I never really thought about that before. (8:34) But actually, the Boogeyman is an entity that transcends (8:37) physical space, so there's really no escaping him. (8:43) Yay! (8:45) Lobster, el jefe.(8:47) Francine's already cracked the claws on this one, (8:49) and how soon are we getting all the stuff we asked for? (8:51) It's Hayley. (8:52) Split. (8:53) Jeff, where were you? (8:55) I was waiting at the open house for an hour.(8:57) I'm sorry, babe, but I want to tell everyone our new plan (9:01) and let them know why I won't be buying them goobodies. (9:04) Open house? (9:05) New plan. (9:06) Goobodies.(9:07) Clothes. (9:08) Babe, you're going to be so proud. (9:10) Proud of me? (9:10) I ingested the money wisely.(9:12) You know the movie We Bought a Zoo? (9:15) Please tell me you did not buy a zoo. (9:18) I didn't. (9:19) I got the exclusive Redbox streaming rights (9:22) to the movie We Bought a Zoo.(9:24) Ah, f***. (9:25) There's more. (9:26) Check this out.(9:28) It's new underwear that hides your fart sounds. (9:31) Listen. (9:34) Ugh, what's that smell? (9:36) Yeah, they smell way worse now.(9:38) But we're working on it. (9:39) I bought the company for a cool million. (9:42) What? (9:42) Well, I've heard enough and smelled enough.(9:46) I think it's time to let you in on one of Suzy Orr-woman's (9:48) once-in-a-lifetime deals. (9:50) These only come along every couple months. (9:52) Feast your eyes on Mount Suzymore, our casino, Jeff.(9:57) You see, it's been my dream to teach my methods (9:59) through the responsible tradition of gambling. (10:01) With your money, we can make my dream come true. (10:04) No, no, no, no, no, no.(10:05) It is not happening, Jeff. (10:07) I am getting you away from these parasites. (10:10) That was me.(10:11) I invested in a competing underwear. (10:15) It's not fair. (10:17) All these years of Jeff taking from us, (10:19) and now he can finally give back, and he won't.(10:21) Well, he did get us Shakira. (10:23) She sucks. (10:24) She has one paw in the grave.(10:26) At this rate, Jeff's gonna lose all that money in days. (10:30) Days. (10:33) Days.(10:34) Oh, I forgot to mention, (10:35) Jeff also got us this robot that looks just like me. (10:39) I'll put her away. (10:40) For now.(10:44) Hi, Steve. (10:45) Did a gross old biddy make her way over here? (10:47) If she does, that's my mother, so please send her home. (10:49) I didn't know your mother was living with you.(10:51) I just moved her in. (10:52) The court named me as her conservator, (10:54) so I'm managing all her affairs and finances now. (10:57) Oh, someone found her.(10:59) I'm so relieved. (11:02) Huh, a conservatorship. (11:04) That's not... (11:05) I mean, that's not something we could do with Jeff, is it? (11:09) No, no, we can't do that.(11:11) But could we? (11:13) Well, it's an interesting word, isn't it? (11:17) Conserve, like saving. (11:19) Yeah, saving Jeff. (11:22) Saving Jeff from Jeff.(11:24) And who better to save him than the people who know him (11:27) and how much money he has best? (11:29) I don't believe this. (11:30) You're actually talking about taking away Jeff's independence? (11:33) We can't leave Jeff in charge of the money. (11:35) He's gonna piss it all away.(11:36) And let's face it, he's never had good bladder control. (11:39) I am not gonna let you do this. (11:41) Well, I guess we'll have to settle this in court, then.(11:45) The basketball court. (11:50) Dang. (11:51) Listen, Jeff, I'll do all the talking.(11:53) You just sit there. (11:55) Here, work on this. (11:56) Court is now in session.(11:58) Honorable Judge Grenier presiding. (12:00) Oh, hopefully we have something sexy today, (12:02) like a murder or a kidnapping. (12:06) A conservatorship hearing.(12:08) Oh, man, I wish someone would murder or kidnap me right now. (12:12) To see if a person meets the legal standard for stupidity, (12:15) I mean, mental incompetency, (12:16) we use what we call the Gilligan Scale. (12:19) At first, I thought Jeff Fisher was more of a Rose (12:21) from the Golden Girls.(12:22) But after further examination, (12:24) I can confidently say he and Gilligan are a perfect match. (12:29) Objection! That scale is absurd! (12:31) Knock, knock. (12:32) Who's there? (12:33) Oh! (12:34) Oh, who? (12:35) Oh, we're ruled! (12:37) And that's lunch.(12:38) I have here a sworn affidavit from a pillar of our community. (12:44) I'm talking about Tom from the grocery store now. (12:47) It's a list of things Jeff Fisher has slipped on (12:50) in the last year alone.(12:53) 47 banana peels, 16 different soup cans, (12:57) a recently un-mopped floor... (12:59) I can't take any more of this. (13:01) Oh, this is getting good. (13:04) Your Honor, my family is not concerned (13:06) with Jeff's well-being at all.(13:08) They just want his money. (13:09) They are the last people who should be caring for him. (13:12) My dad once asked a homeless man to babysit me (13:15) while he went go-kart riding.(13:16) My mom was kicked out of Lollapalooza for being too naked. (13:20) And my brother Steve? (13:21) Well, his Etsy reviews speak for themselves. (13:24) One star.(13:25) The buyers thought Toshi was Tilda Swinton. (13:27) And furthermore, they live with a fish (13:30) who was a January 6th. (13:32) I was just going to see the pandas at the zoo (13:34) and got all turned around.(13:36) Order! I've heard enough! (13:38) But I want to take the stand. (13:40) Not a good idea, babe. (13:41) No, it's a great idea.(13:45) If he lands on his head, I grant conservatorship. (13:50) Conservatorship granted. (13:51) No! (13:52) But not to the greedy family.(13:54) Oh, thank God. (13:55) And not to you either. (13:56) You thought this was a basketball court.(13:58) There's only one person that's right for this job. (14:01) And she happens to be my AA sponsor (14:03) and my financial advisor. (14:05) Hey! (14:06) Damn it, the door's stuck.(14:07) Open this door! (14:08) I'm missing my big entrance. (14:09) Ah! (14:14) What's happening? (14:15) Don't worry. (14:16) I'm going to take great care of you (14:18) and all your gorgeous gobs and gobs of money.(14:20) Come on. (14:21) No, I don't want to. (14:23) What about babe? (14:24) I'm your babe now.(14:27) Damn it, how is this thing stuck again? (14:29) From the inside? (14:30) Where does it even lock from? (14:32) Oh, Jeff, you opened it. (14:33) You're a genius. (14:37) Hey, babe.(14:43) Right on time, Haley. (14:45) This has got to stop. (14:46) You can't keep Jeff Prisoner like this.(14:48) Prisoner? (14:49) Please. (14:50) Look at his view. (14:51) It's a casino prison penthouse, (14:53) just like Britney Spears.(14:54) This is nothing like that. (14:57) Although I do have him performing (14:59) in a song and dance review in the casino theater. (15:02) Look at him.(15:02) He's miserable. (15:03) It's just a tummy ache. (15:05) He won't stop eating the glitter bombs from the show.(15:07) Plus, he's anxious to start (15:09) this conjugal visit you demanded. (15:11) Chop, chop. (15:11) Can we please have a little privacy? (15:13) Oh, of course.(15:13) Sorry, sorry. (15:14) Hey, goons, get out. (15:20) Whenever you're ready.(15:25) Well, the SUV's back. (15:26) Cost me our monthly nut to fix it. (15:28) Looks like Shakira's funeral (15:30) will have to wait until we can save up.(15:32) Oh, I feel awful. (15:33) Of course you do. (15:34) We were this close to the sweet life.(15:37) No, it's not that. (15:39) Could it be that maybe we feel bad (15:41) about what we did to Jeff? (15:42) Yeah. (15:42) No.(15:43) I mean, maybe. (15:44) It's Hailey. (15:45) Split.(15:45) Oh, sorry. (15:46) Reflex. (15:46) How's Jeff? (15:47) Stop acting like you care.(15:49) It's your fault Jeff got taken away from me. (15:53) Oh, Hailey, we're so sorry. (15:55) We didn't want this.(15:57) We just wanted lots of new stuff. (15:59) We want to make this right and bring Jeff home. (16:01) Well, there is something you can help with.(16:07) You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain. (16:10) Too much love, just a bit. (16:12) No, no, no, stop.(16:13) Stop the music. (16:13) Jeff, it's all wrong. (16:15) Whoa, those things are dangerous.(16:17) Hold the balls. (16:18) Hold the flaming balls. (16:19) Jeff, opening night tickets are about to go on sale, (16:22) so I need passion in those eyes, (16:24) and all I'm getting is fear.(16:25) It's so off-putting. (16:27) Hold on a second. (16:28) Go for Susie.(16:29) Can I go home today? (16:31) Protesters chanting, free Jeff? (16:34) That could be very misleading. (16:35) Tickets to see Jeff start at $27. (16:38) Goons, with me.(16:39) And don't let me catch you eating any more glitter bombs. (16:44) Achoo! (16:46) Even better on the way up. (16:52) You guys better get out of here, or at least buy tickets.(16:55) We're not going anywhere until you let Jeff go. (16:58) Free Jeff! (16:59) You fools are no match for... (17:01) Wait, only four Smiths? (17:02) Where's the girl? (17:03) Ha! You fell for it. (17:05) This was Haley's ruse.(17:06) She's inside, freeing Jeff. (17:08) Oh, you got rused so hard. (17:10) Stan! (17:10) Did I say that too early? (17:12) To the getaway car! (17:13) Goons, we got to get to Jeff now! (17:16) Are you friggin' kidding me? (17:18) Hold on, I'm gonna get it this time.(17:20) Don't you try and help me, Frankie. (17:21) Don't you dare! (17:23) Jeff, come with me. Hurry.(17:25) There's a loophole to get you out of the conservatorship, (17:27) but we've got to get you across state lines to do it. (17:30) Huh. (17:31) A whole new life in West Vagina? (17:34) Exactly.Let's go. (17:37) Let's roll! (17:40) Oh, no, no, no, no, no! (17:42) I thought you got this damn jalopy fixed. (17:44) Jeff, this is all your fault.(17:46) If you'd only bought me that car I asked for. (17:48) Dad, are you serious? (17:50) Look! (17:51) It's a Gubati. (17:53) I've never seen one this close.(17:55) It's... It's gorgeous. (18:05) Okay, I'm just gonna say what everyone's thinking. (18:07) Jeff owes us.(18:08) Yeah! (18:09) Let me tell you about... (18:11) No, Klaus. (18:13) We got to get Jeff out of here. (18:14) I'm not so sure about that.(18:16) I've got those conservator forms somewhere. (18:19) This is extortion. (18:20) This is... (18:21) Jeff? (18:24) Whoa! (18:25) Whoa! (18:29) Oh, God! (18:31) It was beautiful, but it stings so bad! (18:35) Keep going, Jeff! (18:37) I'll fight him off! (18:43) Like my reviews on Etsy say, (18:46) bad, very bad.(18:57) Look! There's money! (18:59) I mean, Jeff! (19:04) Jeff, give me your hand! (19:09) Let's get all the boring paperwork out of the way first, huh? (19:14) Everybody, hold on to me! (19:19) Steve, switch places with me. (19:26) I'm coming, Shakira! (19:32) Got you! (19:33) Climb up! (19:40) Okay, I can sign the form now. (19:43) Jeff, don't sign anything or they'll control you! (19:46) I don't care.I just want to go home. (19:49) You still want to live with them? (19:51) They're the only family I've ever had. (19:53) I don't want to lose them.(19:54) That's why I tried to get rid of the money. (19:57) Get rid of the money? (19:58) Yeah, I knew those investments were stupid, (20:00) but I was afraid we'd use the money to buy a house. (20:04) I don't want to move away from my family.(20:07) Oh, Jeff, we're so sorry. (20:10) It doesn't matter that you don't contribute. (20:13) He literally just saved your lives.(20:15) Contribute money, Hailey. (20:17) Jeff, what you contribute is you. (20:21) You're free to spend your money however you want.(20:24) Yeah, about that, there's no money. (20:26) What? (20:27) Turns out I know nothing about casino management. (20:30) My blackjack tables were paying out a thousand to one.(20:33) I think I'm bad with money, (20:34) but I guess we could sell the casino. (20:45) Or not. Most likely not.(20:49) This one's on the house, Jeff. (20:59) It's back! (21:01) Shit. (21:02) Bye, have a beautiful time.(21:09) You

Advertisement